I was born in 1962 at Coral Gables Hospital,
located on the University of Miami campus.
My parents like to brag that their baby was so smart
that she was already in college the day she was born.
I was given the name Cozy after my father's favorite Jazz drummer-
Cozy Cole.
My mother left us when I was 10.
My father always liked to say that she ran away to join the circus.
I like to think of her there in a sequined cape flying through the air
without a single net to catch her fall.
Dad was never a religious man,
but after Mom left, he decided to raise me Catholic.
On Sundays, I went to mass,
and on the first Wednesday of every month, I was sent to confession.
Since I could never bring myself to confess any of my real sins,
I kept four made-up sins that I used over and over again.
Though Bobby and I had never touched,
he wrote me poems all through high school.
Later, I accepted his proposal for marriage.
I knew Bobby loved me and figured someday I'd probably grow to love him too.
We purchased our new home through a city auction.
The previous owner had murdered her husband and buried him inside the shower wall.
Bobby said aside from being affordable,
the house was also a good conversation piece.
I often thought about this woman and wondered what made her act so violently.
I guess it wasn't any one big thing,
but a lot of little things that just grew deeper and deeper under her skin.
Freeze! Police!
Most tourists visit the Miami area for its beaches on the east coast,
but if you ever mistakenly got on the Palmetto Expressway and headed west,
you'd run right into the Florida Everglades,
an area that Indians like to call "the River of Grass."
People used to think this area was uninhabitable
but more and more it's becoming civilized,
and they say that within two years
there will be a shopping center every 15 miles.
Thanks.
I've heard it said that the mother-child bond begins at birth.
For me, this Never occurred.
And on some days, I'd sit at my window for hours
just waiting for a nice couple in a big station wagon to come and take these kids away.
Too much daydreaming left me blue.
So while Bobby worked day and night,
I stayed home and tried to make the best of my time.
This guy's sitting at the bar like a dead fish not talking to anyone,
when this redhead comes up and takes a seat next to him.
They strike up a conversation.
Eventually, the conversation turns to sex.
She says, "Great. I like kinky sex too. Let's go to my place."
So they go to her place.
He goes in the bathroom.
She takes off all of her clothes and gets under the covers.
After a couple of minutes, he comes out of the bathroom. He's straightening his tie.
He says- She says, "Hey, where you going?"
He says, "I'm through. I already shit in your purse."
Freeze! Police!
Well, that's the best one I know.
If that doesn't help, I can only offer more booze.
It's funny how a single day could drag and drag
while entire years just flip by in a flash.
Once I calculated how many hours old I was
and then estimated how many more hours there were to go.
On another day,
I made a list of every person I had ever known.
I wondered if any of these people knew each other
and if there was any chance that they were all together now
having a party or swimming in a pool.
Then I wondered if there was any other person on this planet as lonely as me.
As it turned out, there was, and he was living just a county away.
8:00, Lee.
First thing this morning, right, my dad's out on a run.
So I'm just, like, hanging out, having a cigarette,
and I notice something on the end of the road there, you know.
I couldn't really make out what it was.
From here, it looked like a gun.
So we go over to check it out.
Sure enough there it is- a fucking gun laying right at the edge of the street.
What, like a real gun? Yes, like a very real gun.
I got it hidden in the back there in some boxes. It makes me nervous.
Well, what kind of gun?
I don't know. It's black with a brown handle.
Do you know anything about guns?
Doug, you coming to work today?
Look, you gonna be around later? I'll bring it on by.
Julie giving you the night out?
Working a little late. You gonna be around or-
Yeah, I'm around.
Shoot up the neighborhood. Sure, Dougie.
You sick or something?
Hi, Dad.
Oh, you smell like a bottle of gin.
I'm doing a little undercover work,
and just so happens this guy I'm tailing likes to spend his life in a bar.
There seems to be no telling which way a life will go.
In his younger days, my father played drums in after-hours clubs all around Miami.
A few times he even played New York.
But when my mother became pregnant with me,
he gave it all up and settled into a steady job as a crime scene detective.
He said that the law was a straight line
and that no man could stand firmly with a foot on each side.
Yeah. Ned Bishop. Fucking guy shot my fish.
I asked the guy for a net.
Next thing, he's firing his fucking UZI into the water.
Blew a hole like this right through my fish.
Who goes fishing without a net?
Men, I'd like you to meet my wife.
- This is Mary. - Hello.
I hate to bust up the little party you gentlemen have going here,
but I came to see you, Ryder.
So rather than have you drag yourself out in the daylight,
I figured I'd grab you here tonight.
So if you don't mind.
An officer doesn't just lose his gun
any more than he just looses his hand.
His weapon is an extension of his body.
Now I may be a little idealistic here, Ryder,
but I'd like to think that an officer, if he did lose his gun-
an officer, that is, who's been in the department for some 30-odd years-
that he might, just might have a small sliver of recall
as to the where and the when.
I'm putting you on a week's suspension, Ryder.
A detective from the internal affairs will be assigned to investigate the situation.
I think I can find my own gun.
Man, I could shoot my way right out of here.
Come on, Lee, they're not exactly holding you hostage.
No kidding.
My grandmother keeps running in and out of here with her tape measure.
She's gonna give you the boot?
I've been in this room my whole life.
Yeah, and you've hated it your whole life.
You know, you're gonna be 30 in a few months.
Maybe, you know, you should go out of here.
Do a little traveling, see the world.
Maybe even join the service.
The service? Fuck the service, man.
I hate flying. I hate camping. I hate jumping.
They don't make you fly.
Oh, yeah? You ever heard of anybody driving off to war?
See the world.
I don't see you seeing the world, Dougie.
I see you working at your father's shop till you drop dead from the fumes.
Well, maybe that's the sad truth.
Look, now you got me all depressed. I'm gonna go.
See you later.
Hey, I forgot the gun.
You know, I don't even know what I should do with this thing.
I mean, I can't keep it at the apartment. Guns just flip Julie out.
Julie.
Why don't you go out there and sell it to my mom?
Come on. Seriously.
I don't know, you could sell it in one of those bars out in Broward County.
Broward?
I can't go to Broward.
I'm out of my element in Broward.
I'll see you later.
Hey, Lee.
Maybe you want to try selling it?
8:00, Lee.
Get the fuck out of here!
Morning, Cozy.
Hey, J.C.
Looks like you're dropping a new pup every time the wind changes direction.
How's Shelley doing?
She's good. Been seeing some boy from over at the junior college.
You see them everywhere you look.
And I don't know why I never thought of it before,
but one day I just started wondering-
where are all those highways heading?
That new captain, he just doesn't understand your dad.
They got off on the wrong foot when Ortiz told him he couldn't bring animals into the, uh-
into the office anymore.
Most people don't stop to consider that four out of five murder victims are pet owners.
Your dad can't seem to manage leaving the scene without those animals.
Ortiz gets on board and lays down the "no pets" law.
Your dad took it real hard and things haven't been going smoothly since.
Hey, looks like they're gonna finish the highway yet.
Pretty looking with all the, uh, tar all new and sparkly like that.
I better get these babies home before they burn up.
Good enough.
You be careful driving now.
I don't know how you manage working all night and sleeping all day.
I have a horrible time sleeping during the day.
Well, after 30 years or so, you get use to it.
Well, I'd never get used to it.
Not that I wouldn't enjoy a little catnap.
They say that the apple doesn't fall far from the tree.
I found this puzzling and couldn't stop wondering-
are our lives all mapped out for us?
Would my daughter grow up only to wear my shoes?
Did my mother's life create my destiny,
or does one thing just trigger another?
What's with the locks?
Hey, what's with the locks?
Grandma, all my stuff's in there!
Grandma, open the fucking door!
Uh, you driving that blue Malibu out there? Why?
Well, you almost just ran me over a minute ago. That was you?
Yeah.
So can I buy you a drink,
seeing as how I almost ran you over and everything?
Okay. Yeah.
What are you drinking? How about a beer?
I'm Lee. I'm sorry about tonight.
Cozy. What?
I'm Cozy.
Yeah, it's nice in here.
No, I mean that's my name.
It is not.
Your mother give you that name?
Cozy. It's a funny name.
You meeting somebody here tonight, Cozy?
No, I just had the urge to get out.
Yeah. I had the urge to drink.
So, it's fate.
So what were you doing out in that pasture anyway?
Just taking a little shortcut.
Not afraid of some old bull chasing after you?
No. The cow in that pasture died during the last rain.
Oh.
Yeah, I guess cows aren't really built for swimming.
No, it didn't drown. It got struck by lightning.
That would be a bad way to go.
Well, I could think of worse ways.
Really?
You're not from around here, are you?
Nope.
I'm from Dade.
Actually, I was from Dade.
I'm kind of in limbo right now.
Limbo. That sounds nice.
This I found...
in a waiting room.
It's good luck.
Mom.
That's fucking George.
That's a picture of my pride and joy.
And this...
that's all that's left of my white Nova.
Are you trying to impress me?
Is it working? Well, what else you got?
Mom?
But we already have mom here.
Hey, Cozy? Yeah, I got to get going.
Hey, you feel like going for a swim?
I got a friend with a pool. He lets me use it whenever I want.
No, I can't. I got to go home. Come on. It's Friday night.
I'd drive you back home afterwards.
Or back to that cow pasture you crawled out of.
I just can't. Come on. Not even for half an hour?
That's good.
Nobody broke in here.
She got dressed up and went out.
You two have a fight?
Yeah, I guess.
More like an argument really.
She take a suitcase?
No, she didn't take her suitcase.
What's the gun for?
Belongs to a friend of mine.
You kill anybody with it?
No.
I killed my dog.
You shot your dog?
No, he got run over.
And you were driving?
No, but I'm the one who let him out.
Oh, shit!
Shit! Fuck!
Goddamn it!
I can't believe it. Shit!
Do you think we killed him?
Cozy.
We should just get out of here.
Hit the road, maybe go up north somewhere.
Just lay low till things blow over.
Did you ever wonder what it would be like
to be held up in some motel somewhere,
seeing your life played out on TV,
knowing that the whole world was looking for you?
You know, this place is pretty creepy looking in the daylight.
You don't by chance carry around a toothbrush with you, do you?
Oh, shit!
There's a palmetto bug in there! Don't let him come out!
Well, give me something to smash it with. Well, hold on.
Shit! We don't even have our shoes.
Here!
Ahh! Did you get him?
Give me another Bible. Here! Here!
Shoot it!
I think I peed in my pants.
Is it dead yet?
I don't know. I shot the shit out of the tiles though.
Okay, okay. I'll be right out.
They ought to give my grandmother a job here.
If you're staying, it's 20 more dollars.
Uh-
Uh, the thing is, uh- is 16 good?
No, 20 is good.
Bitch.
Let's get out of here.
Lee and I had crossed that straight line
that Dad called the law,
and I could feel the butterflies in my stomach
as I tumbled deeper into a life of crime.
After all, murder was thicker than marriage,
and Lee and I were now bound by the life we took.
Being a wanted man made Lee restless,
and he swore he'd never sleep soundly until we were well out of Florida.
So he stole his mother's record collection
figuring even if we only got a dollar a record,
we would still have enough money to fill the tank
and make Miami a mere speck in our rearview mirror.
It was just like I told the officer last night.
I heard some voices and some rustlin'.
I got my light. I came out back.
I saw her sitting right over there,
pointing a gun right at me.
It was as if she was there waiting for me.
Did you get a look at the person she was with? No, sir, I didn't.
I'm driving.
He's waitin'.
Couple minutes go by.
So she finally walks up, and the guy's all dressed.
She goes, "Hey, where you goin'?"
"I already shit in your purse." I've heard it.
Oh, shit on you. Hey, man.
You got some really nice- This is real nice stuff here.
You know, but basically, I only deal in jazz, you know, so, uh-
You ought to hang on to that stuff.
Hey, arrest that guy. He walked out in the middle of my sentence.
Yeah? Which joke were you tellin'?
Aw, youth today, man. Nothing's sacred. Startin' to realize that.
Blue Note.
Yeah, right here.
Ryder.
Okay, we're on our way.
Come on. Okay.
What if I'd been at home?
Has he ever gotten physical with you?
Or his mother?
Oh, he's never taken a strike at me, but the language-
The language he uses is just awful.
That doesn't count.
Well, it should.
You dust this? No, it's clean.
Anyway, to- to make a long story short,
by 6:00 we're all eatin' this barbecued goat,
drinkin' beer and so forth.
Things are goin' along nicely, and Clark, he's being really low-key,
which is a nice change of pace for Clark.
You familiar with any of his high school teachers?
Specifically a Mr. Humphrey.
Tall black man?
High school? He's almost 30 years old, for Christ's sake.
You know, you don't seem too surprised by all of this.
Isn't this strange behavior for your son?
Well, he took my heels. That was a bit strange.
Oh, he's all mixed up.
So all night long as, uh, people finish eating,
they're stacking their plates of leftovers out near the truck.
The odd thing is, the dog never seems to be the slightest bit interested.
He just stays under the truck ignoring the food.
Now, it's not the nature of a dog to ignore food like that.
Well, before long, Garret realizes the dog isn't under the truck.
J.C., is this really the short version of the story?
You get what I'm saying to you?
That was no goddamn goat we barbecued.
That was Garret's dog.
Clark, he's a- He's a fuckin' sicko.
Some people say it's like a disease, you know?
Once you start, you can't stop till you're all filled up.
Spider's pretty much filled up.
He's got this... cobra that starts
way up on his shoulder.
Kind of drapes down and covers his entire chest.
Used to be a tattoo of his wife.
But if you look real close you can see
how the cobra's head was once the wife's face.
See, he used the original eyes.
The wife's eyes are now the cobra's eyes.
Spider always said his wife was half snake anyway.
I told you already. He'll be back in a little while.
He'll come to your office and pay you then, all right?
Well, I hope so.
Lee hadn't slept well in two nights
on account of we were still in Dade County
in the very neighborhood where we had shot a man dead.
Since my purse and photo ID had been left at the scene of the crime,
Lee said I should hang back at the motel
and remain out of sight.
Anyways, I didn't know much about holdups
and Lee didn't want me gettin' in the way of his crime spree.
Hey!
You know you breakin' the law, man, comin' in here with your shoes off?
There's a dress code in Dade County.
Go ahead and get what the hell you want and get the hell out of here.
11.60, sir.
What's the matter with you? You understand English? 1 1.60.
Don't move. Get back. Get back!
- Sucker. - Hey, man, you gotta pay. Come back here. Hey!
You owe me money! Bring my fuckin' money back here!
We used to go to River Ranch's campgrounds
two weekends out of every month.
Those two weekends could get really crazy.
My mom could get pretty crazy.
You know, she could out-drink just about anybody, man or woman,
regardless of body weight.
I remember this one time my dad came crashing into the camper.
My mom hated anybody quitting a party,
and I could hear her outside yellin',
"Jimmy, this is the devil. I want you to come out and play with me."
And my dad yelled out, "And this is God,
and if you don't shut up, I'm gonna strike you dead."
Well, that left just Carl and my mom.
Carl ran the campgrounds.
Anyways, the party broke up kind of early the next morning
when my dad threw all our junk in the camper.
I was still up in my bed.
Just then he just slammed the camper door and hopped in his truck,
and- and drove off.
I rode the whole way home in the back of the camper,
not even knowing my mom wasn't with us.
The spent bullet is marked.
McGwire's the one that found the flaw in Jimmy's gun in the first place.
He coined it "the crapper,"
and he's certain that the bullet fired at Humphrey
is the same bullet that came from Ryder's gun.
The way I see things,
you used to have two problems-
a missing daughter and a missing gun.
The way it looks now,
they're really the same problem.
Do you think there's some girl standing in a motel room far away
lookin' at a picture and thinking about me?
I doubt it.
She finds men to marry her.
Recently she's been in a bit of a slump,
but she'll bounce back.
My real father married her twice.
Their second honeymoon,
we all went to stay down on Key Biscayne.
They just started goin' at it in the same old way,
yellin' their heads off.
So right out of the blue, my dad just gets up off the couch,
walks out the door,
keeps on walkin'
right into the ocean.
Still had his clothes on.
Probably still had his drink in his hand.
Anyway, the point is, about a half a minute after they buried my dad,
my mom made the fuckin' mortician.
What a fuckin' creepy guy he was.
Leopold.
A fuckin' creepy mortician.
Very creepy living with that guy.
11:00. Twenty more dollars.
Hey, roachy.
It's funny how a person could leave everything she knew behind
and still wind up in such a familiar place.
I stood near the water, thinking about different things
and sometimes catching a glimpse of my life,
as if I was thumbing through an old photo album.
I saw my dad being young and playing jazz in our Florida room
while my mom laid naked on the cold terrazzo floor.
I saw Bobby in his black-and-white uniform,
and I could almost smell that restaurant stench
that had become so much a part of him.
And I saw Lee in his blue car nearly runnin' me down,
looking so much like a guy on his way to somewhere.
Come on, Jimmy, let me take you home.
Nah, this'll do fine.
Everybody's leaving.
Anyway, you don't wanna start drinkin' now.
What's she doin' with this guy?
I think the thing to do is go ahead and put an APB out on these kids.
She's no kid.
New York City? Yeah.
I'd like a refund, please. Cash refund.
They're a little old. I never used 'em.
Oh, shit!
Come on, come on, come on. What- What is up?
We're gettin' out of here. You look like you just saw a ghost.
Aren't we gettin' on the bus?
That place was filled with fuckin' deadbeats.
I don't see anything. You weren't in there.
What about New York? We can drive to New York.
Damn it! I hate buses. I can't even get on a fuckin' bus.
Well, what were we doin' at a bus station?
Shit.
You got any money? Me? No, I don't have any money.
I don't have the fuckin' toll.
We need a quarter.
What the fuck we gonna do?
Cozy, come on. Run it.
We can't run it. Go!
Shit.
You have to pull over there to the side for me, please.
May I see your license and registration? Yes.
Just your license and registration, not your wallet.
Lee Ray Harold, North Miami?
That's you? Yep.
Lee, this is your car?
Yeah. Mm-hmm.
All right, I'm going to ask both of you to sit right here
till I come back, okay?
Lee, we're through. Just be still. Everything's okay.
What is okay? Where's the gun?
What are you gonna do with it? Nothing.
Lee, he's calling on his radio. He's gonna find out.
- Cozy, where the fuck is the gun? - You can't shoot a cop.
I'm not gonna shoot the fuckin'- Let me drive.
Jesus, Cozy, will you cool it? Let me drive!
We didn't kill anybody. He wasn't even fuckin' hurt.
Lee, do you have money with you? Um-
You do know this is a toll road? Yeah.
Florida Highway Patrol doesn't tread lightly on toll-gate crashers.
You still at this North Miami address?
Yeah. Okay.
Tell you what I'm gonna ask you to do.
I want you to turn your car completely around
and head on back home to North Miami.
And the next time you think you wanna take a ride on a toll road,
you make sure you have money in your pocket
and a cool head on your shoulders.
You hear me? Yeah.
Okay.
You take care now.
Suddenly, I wasn't sure of anything.
I wasn't on the lam after all.
I wasn't layin' low or ducking cops,
and if I was, no one cared.
We hadn't killed anybody.
I couldn't even be sure we had really killed the palmetto bug back in the motel room.
So if we weren't killers, we weren't anything.
Cozy, I'm sorry.
I was gonna tell you as soon as we got out of Florida.
You know my friend Doug and his girlfriend Julia, they have this apartment.
It's not too big, but the rent's pretty cheap. We could stay with them.
I could get a job. Maybe get two jobs for a while.
Get some money comin' in.
Couple months, we could get an apartment.
Maybe in the same complex.
Closed-Captioned by Captions, Inc., Burbank, CA
♪ I can't stand around with my hands on the ground ♪
♪ I'm thinkin' that I just cannot schmooze her ♪
♪ I'm guessin' that I just wanna lose ♪